In this soul teaching on the art of surrendering and the manifesting mojo, you will learn: The manifesting formula that will create the life and business you desire Why surrendering to the Universe can be so scary Why surrender is the key to experiencing Heaven on...
Why You Shouldn’t Take Things Personally on the Twin Flame Journey or in Life in General
by Sabriyé Ayana
Spiritual author, Multidimensional Healer, Founder of Akasha Quantum Soul Healing™ & the School of Inner Union
In this soul teaching on why you shouldn’t take things personally on the Twin Flame journey or in life in general, you will learn:
- The #1 mistake most Divine Feminines make
- How you can stop taking your Twin’s behavior personally
- Why romantic expectations toward your Twin Flame hinder your journey
- Why you must overcome your ego and embrace your soul’s plan for you and your life
- And more…
The number #1 mistake most Divine Feminines make
Many Divine Feminines make their Twin Flame journey much harder than it needs to be, because they take their Divine Masculine’s behavior towards them personally.
In this teaching I will explain why you should never take things personally with your Twin Flame or with anybody else in your life.
Learning to do so will make your life so much more easy and will allow you to make a quantum leap in vibrational frequency, because feeling insulted, hurt and angry aren’t beneficial to your vibrational frequency or overall well-being.
Just to be clear what I will teach you in this teaching does NOT involve repressing your emotions, because to be honest it’s better to have a lower vibrational emotion pass through than it is to repress it. Repressing an emotion only keeps you stuck in it’s vibrational frequency which actually harms you more.
There is nothing wrong with honoring your emotions and allowing yourself to feel them, even if they are so called ‘negative’ emotions.
It does not attract more of the same vibration, only repressing emotions attracts more of the same to help you release it. However allowing yourself to feel your emotions does not give you the right to unleash them on others, those are two distinctively different things. Feeling your emotions is an internal process, that does not involve sharing what you feel with others – which is often useless because it only makes the other person feel attacked.
What I will teach you in this teaching is how to shift your perspective in such a way, that it doesn’t trigger any ‘lower’ vibrational frequency response in you in the first place. Learning to do this will bring immense peace in your life, it will get rid of the freaking drama and contribute to your inner sense of happiness.
Because if you don’t take things personally, no one can knock you out of your zen.
But, how can I not take my twin’s behavior personally?!
It may seem like an almost insurmountable task to not take your twin’s behavior personally, because well you don’t know any way other than to take it personally.
You have been conditioned that way, which I will come back to later.
You feel rejected, abandoned, ignored, invalidated, unheard, unseen, undervalued, unloved and disrespected when your twin keeps you at arms length, blocks you, runs out on you, doesn’t answer your texts, doesn’t pick up the phone, doesn’t show up on appointments, etc. etc.
One of the biggest misunderstandings that trips us up on this journey, are our romantic expectations towards our Twin Flame, because we of course expect the person we love and who has often also confirmed they love us to NOT make us feel any of the above.
Instead we expect commitment from our lovers, we expect engagement, a show of interest in us, closeness, being validated, feeling heard, feeling seen, feeling loved.
We expect them to make us feel good and we are left shocked when the person we love most in the world, refuses to play their part the way we expect them to.
The thing is that meeting your Twin Flame is meant to be so much more than just another ‘boy meets girl’ love story, it’s a Divine Mission. Download the free Ultimate Guide to Inner Union to find out why this is meant to be so much more than the love affair of a lifetime.
As I will explain in the rest of this teaching there is a higher purpose to your twin acting like an insensitive jerk. It says nothing about their true feelings for you or the depth of their love. It is all part of the Soul Plan you scripted together in the spirit realm before you came here to planet Earth.
You chose this experience because you wanted to know how true love felt, but in order to experience true love – we first need to let go of all our false beliefs around love that have kept us from the genuine experience of true love to begin with.
Bringing in a new template for love
In our society for thousands and thousands of years we have been running the conditional and codependent romantic love program. This is a psychological programming in which we are taught that love is first of all conditional and that we need to bend over backwards (codependency) to keep meeting the requirements to receive the love of others outside of us. Which when you think about it is only natural, if you make an outside source – the source of your experience of love then you ‘have to do everything‘ not to ever lose that source or quickly replace it if lost.
But let me give you this reframe, what if your twin’s refusal to become the external source of your love in fact teaches you (leaves you no choice but) to become the source of your own love. What if your twin is not acting in all the above undesired ways, because he or she doesn’t love you, but because they love you so much that they want you to experience being loved to such depth as a constant state – whether they are near or far?
As Twin Flames part of our Divine Mission is bringing in a new romantic love template based on unconditional love and finding this love within first, so that it will be mirrored back to you as a constant state.
For what we believe and hold to be true inside of us, is what we experience as our physical reality outside of us.
This is a 180 degree turnaround on our old 3D romantic love programming where love was found outside of us and was only provided when we met the conditions the outside source of love required for it to be given. These are all subconscious programs that we have been conditioned in over lifetimes and lifetimes, so chances are you never really noticed you were doing this because well – everyone is doing this. It’s what we consider normal in our society.
So when our Twin Flame deviates from this programming without consciously having a clue why, this old programming gets triggered and we start matching the twin’s behavior with what we thought love should look like. It doesn’t help that our friends and family who are also running the conditional codependent love programming tell us, this person can’t possibly love us if they don’t act the way a lover should.
If we buy into this old story of what love should look like, then yes it becomes extremely difficult to not take the Twin Flame’s behavior personally. Yet if we look at it from the new perspective I just gave you, then we see that the twin instead of giving us a fish – is teaching us how to fish.
You can’t teach someone how to fish without stopping the fish supply, because why would they need to learn how to fish if they have you to provide them in their daily needs. It’s the same with love, only in the absence of the active expression of love (they love you whether they express it or not) are we forced to find the love for ourselves within, instead of relying on the love coming from outside of us. Our seeking love outside of us programming is simply too deeply ingrained, to be able to rewire it while the love we seek is being supplied from without.
It is when we find the love we seek within, that it will automatically be mirrored back to us in our physical reality – not only by our Twin Flame but through all circumstances, people and experiences we meet.
Overcoming the ego
When the pay-off is that big, it is in fact silly to take things personally.
So why do we do it?
Why do we become angry and hurt when the twin pulls back?
Because from an ego perspective we fear loss or actually experience loss and the ego simply cannot see the soul’s purpose for setting up this situation.
The ego doesn’t have a clue that it is rewriting the romantic love programming and making a 180 degree turnaround in consciousness. It only sees that it’s not getting what it wants and makes that not getting what it wants all about itself.
The ego doesn’t trust that everything is always happening for our highest good without exceptions, whether in life in general or in relation to our Twin Flame, nothing is by accident – it all serves a higher purpose.
Let me give you a real life example of this, that is not twin related but the principle works the same nonetheless. I have just returned from Egypt where I had rented an Airbnb from someone I have known for years in Amsterdam and that I have a business relationship with. I went to Egypt to scope out the next Gangsta Goddesses Retreat there and to return to my twin’s and my soul roots as we are from the Egyptian lineage.
I was very excited about meeting up with my Dutch friend who has a husband, a house and a boat there and to work out the details of an upcoming retreat with her. Instead as soon as my friend arrived, the energy shifted and it became quite clear that she had thought she had landed herself a cash cow.
Though she claimed to be giving me friend rates, her initial plan would cost me 4,000 euro which included a 3 day boat trip to Aswan costing 2,150 euro in total. When I told her that I was not planning to spend that much, I had already paid 1.000 euro for the house mind you – she crossed some things off and came with a 2K offer which I also declined.
Apparently she was desperate for money and then she made me a 1K offer that only included the very basics. It was actually 700 euro, but then the next day she invited me to the souk, the Winter Palace for a drink and lunch on her boat all on her expense and with that invitation I got an updated version of the previous night’s calculation and it was 300 euro more than the night before with no further explanation. Though it seemed a friendly invitation with which she should have started off in the first place, it didn’t feel as her treat but more at my expense because she had just raised the price with 300 euro.
To top it off we got food-poisoning from the lack of hygiene that our cook practiced in the kitchen and our Airbnb host didn’t even come and check on us until I asked. She is specialized in natural healing, but by that time she was fuming pissed with me. A friend and client of mine had come to visit and I had booked a tour for us elsewhere as the Airbnb hosts claimed that only a car and a driver already cost 35 euro p.p. I had booked a guided tour for less, including a very knowledgeable guide. When I got sick, the tour guide immediately messaged me if I needed a doctor or needed to go to the hospital. When I let the Airbnb host know we were sick, she claimed it wasn’t food-poisoning but anger.
Things quickly went from bad to worse and the house had been extremely uncomfortable to begin with as there was only AC in the bedrooms and the rest of the house was like a burning oven with 43 degrees Celsius outside – the temperature inside was unbearably hot. So we had basically been locked up in the bedroom for 8 days of which two days extremely sick. We tried to eat our dinners downstairs but the extreme heat that lingered for hours, only caused more stomach upsets.
Then Sunday night at close to 2 am in the morning I get a new message from the Airbnb host with yet another calculation demanding immediate payment for reasons unknown to me. My friend was leaving that morning and apparently she was afraid she wouldn’t be paid. For the life of me I still don’t understand what could have been so urgent at 2 am in the morning and I was like that’s it – we are out of here. So in the middle of the night I booked the Winter Palace a 5 star hotel on the East Bank of Luxor (the Airbnb is on the West Bank in the middle of nowhere) and let the Airbnb host know we were leaving first thing in the morning.
I had of course also during my stay worked with my own healers and coaches and one of the things that had come up just before the food-poisoning was trusting the Universe blindly without the need for a safety net. Leaving the ‘safety’ of the known to embrace the unknown in trust. It was a massive paradox because the fact that I had known the Airbnb host had given me a false sense of safety, when in fact our stay at her house had been very challenging from the start where she had told me that the weather around that time of the year would be lovely – just around 25 degrees Celsius and it turned out to be almost 20 degrees hotter when we arrived.
Even leaving the Airbnb proved to be difficult as they refused to send a car until I went to the bank with one of the employees and paid the remainder in cash. I had offered to pay it through Airbnb, but she demanded cash. After a lot of screaming over the phone between them and their employee, it turned out that all the drama was over 113 euro that needed to be paid! Hardly an amount to get your panties in a bunch over, especially when you live in Amsterdam like this woman does (you’re lucky to get dinner for that amount). Why was she making such a fuss over nothing?
We got into a car to go to an ATM to get the money and interestingly enough the ATM refused to give me money on both my bank cards, despite the fact that there was more than enough money and I had used my cards successfully before. The employee that was with me and with whom both my son and I had had past lives, there was such instant recognition between all of us from the day we met – squeezed me lovingly in my arm and apologized for everything that was happening.
By the time we got to the hotel I got a message from the Airbnb host to tell me she had miscalculated and I now would receive money back from her, that lasted long enough for her employee to give me the money back that I already paid and for him to leave without another visit to the ATM. After that she realized she had miscalculated again and she basically told me to go f*ck myself and that I was so low vibe and lost she never wanted to see me again!
The feeling was completely mutual of course and in the end her greediness to cash in NOW, not only cost her losing out on facilitating a future retreat. It also lost her two clients to her natural healing practice in Amsterdam.
All the while I was like ‘What the f*ck is going on here? Why is she acting like a raving lunatic?!’ There was definitely some past life sh*t being worked out between us – but this situation was so preposterous, it wasn’t even funny anymore.
I could have spent the rest of my stay in Luxor resenting this woman and her treatment, but I didn’t. I chose to drop it and we had an amazing time. Instead of engaging in her drama, I simply blocked her on Facebook and closed off the energy. Had I taken her absurd behavior personally, it would have ruined my mood and the rest of my stay.
I shifted my focus from being irritated with her to the fact that we were now staying in a fully air-conditioned Colonial style palace, that we were no longer confined to our bedrooms to survive the heat. We had delicious French cuisine, after a week of as good as daily falafel because the cook didn’t know what to cook for vegetarians and no more heat during meals to upset our stomachs. 43 degrees Celsius became a lot easier to handle this way and our stomach issues were gone immediately.
Plus talk about a change in energy, the energy in the hotel was so serene and peaceful – while the energy in the house had felt completely off even after we saged the place.
Everything is truly happening for your highest good
Now let me introduce a second interesting story line. That same day that I arrived at the hotel, I was supposed to meet up with one of my clients, who would also be in Luxor that day.
Rewind a couple of weeks back when I was in Italy, I worked with a young woman in an Akasha Quantum Soul Healing Journeys™ and Egypt came up everywhere in her session. So much so that it became clear that there had been some heavy wounding in past lives that had needed to be healed for her to be able to go there, which she desperately wanted.
Only a couple hours after our session together, she got the chance out of the blue to join the Elisabeth Purvis retreat to Egypt at only the cost of an airplane ticket. The spot was already fully paid by someone who couldn’t make it last minute and my client was selected to join this $9.997 retreat for free provided she could get to Cairo, Egypt within two days – which she managed despite being a single mother of three.
A perfect example of the law of attraction in action, as she aligned to the frequency of Egypt and removed her own blocks to going to Egypt, the Universe swooped in with a free spot on a retreat she would have otherwise not been able to afford. Giving her a tenfold return on her investment with me.
At first I had been invited to the boat the retreat was being held on, but as they were doing ceremonies that day no outsiders were allowed on the boat. So I invited my client to come to the Winter Palace, which I had booked in the middle of the night. We agreed to meet each other at three pm, which gave me some time to nap as I had only slept a couple of hours that night.
On my way to the hotel I had become nervous fearing this BIG test of faith, now that I was leaving the known for the unknown. What would I encounter? What challenges would I have to overcome? Was it going to be hard? Would I be able to meet and overcome the challenges that seemed inevitably on it’s way?
When I got to the hotel my client asked to move up the appointment by three hours, which meant in one hour for lunch to which I agreed. We went to drink a cup of tea and eat a small snack while waiting for the client to come and join us in the hotel bar. When my client arrives, so does another couple who are seated across the room from us.
They get served before we do and the waiters come in with big wooden boxes that turn out to be part of a high tea arrangement, with a variety of beautiful bite sized sandwiches and sweets. We politely ask if we may come look at their dish and the man has the waiter send us a tray of his sweets. My client starts to engage a conversation with the woman, that is picked up again after we have all finished our food.
What happens next will blow you away.
The woman from England is in Egypt for the eight time and introduces the man as her Egypt based business partner with whom she is planning a retreat. So my client tells her she is on a retreat with Elisabeth, who the English woman also knows as she has done one of Elisabeth’s programs years back. It then turns out that the man has just started his own company and actually used to work for the people facilitating the Elisabth Purvis retreat and had already been mentioned to my client during the retreat.
Then I start talking to the English woman and we find out that we both know Elisabeth Clare Prophet and her teachings. Not only that she knows too that Ascended Master Serapis Bey who has been showing up in my healing sessions since before I booked my trip to Egypt, has his etheric retreat in the temple of Luxor and she was also able to tell me where the ascension flame that is kept in this temple, is felt best.
Remember I had come to Egypt for two reasons to plan the next retreat and for my own Twin Flame connection and healing, both of these now being served to me on a silver platter. A reliable company to facilitate the retreat I want to host and someone who showed me the exact spot I needed to go to connect to Serapis Bey who had summoned me to come to him.
I was in awe of how our souls had orchestrated this miraculous meeting, as the couple had also first planned to be there at three and moved up their visit to get out of the midday heat, bringing us all together there in the back room of the hotel bar and all these interesting lines of connection between us.
Had my Airbnb host not acted the way she did, I would have never left the house or checked into the Winter Palace where we were all meant to meet. Had I stayed in the house the constant stomach upsets caused by the extreme heat would have prevented me from going out – so I had to leave, no matter what.
Throughout the story you can see how each time we were all brought closer and closer to this meeting, until all of our souls got us together in that one room where we could physically meet up and connect.
You can also see that even though it may seem in a negative way, the soul of my Airbnb host played a crucial part in my test of faith that was not still lying ahead of me as I had feared on my way to the hotel but was in fact my decision to leave her house and check into the hotel in the middle of the night.
Her absurd behavior was needed in this case to let go of the safety net, that knowing her prior to my visit represented so that I could fully embrace the unknown and know that I am safe no matter what (which has been my core wounding).
That moment in time, in which this synchronistic meeting took place has been life changing for me and it’s etched into my soul forever. I was simply awestruck by the ingenuity with which this meeting of souls was orchestrated.
Even if I will not work with this man on an Egyptian retreat, he organized a tour for us the next day that brought us to the Goddess Sekhmet temple and the temple of Mut (that not many tour guides know how to find) which were pivotal in my soul work in regards to my Twin Flame journey, while the Luxor temple visit was much more about my personal mission as an Ascension teacher.
This destined meeting of souls has completely changed me and my experiences.
Since then we have gone shopping with a man who claimed to work at the hotel, who took us to various shops in backstreets and then paid our taxi back to the hotel. We went on a 5 am boat trip on the Nile with one of the shopkeepers at the hotel to see the sunrise and to put our feet in the Nile and last but not least we went with a Kalesh driver that drove us to the Luxor temple and Luxor museum and waited for us at every stop and then brought us back to the hotel – he even walked with me to the stairs to discourage another shopkeeper that was hitting on me.
It was like the Universe sent us angels each time to help us go where we wanted to go or do what we wanted to do. The Universe had our back all the way and we had the most amazing time for the remainder of our visit to Egypt.
Now you may be scratching your head asking yourself how this relates to your twin? Also with your twin, everything is always happening for your highest good – even when you can’t see how just yet. It is imperative to not make their behavior about you, because it’s not. They aren’t doing what they are doing to hurt you or because they don’t care about you the way you hope they do. They themselves don’t even know, why they treat you like this and they feel guilty as hell because they feel you deserve so much more better than what they are giving you.
On a soul level, what you are experiencing is exactly what it should be – because exactly this experience will help you make the internal shift your soul seeks to make in the physical realm.
I pray that sharing my real life example inspires you to stop taking things personally too, with your twin and everybody else.
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It’s through healing the wounded ego, that we not only come into union with our soul – but unlock our soul’s superpower to create the reality we dream of.
Have you tried everything else to manifest the life of your dreams, but failed?
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