The process I share in this soul teaching is how I got two books published as an unknown author, got off of welfare over a decade ago, got a ton of media coverage, cracked my first ever five-figure month, manifested cars, got to visit India and be in the arms of the love of my life at that time, manifested consecutive six-figure years, traveled the world with my family paying everything x3, and manifested moving to Ibiza and now my dream home.
This is not a story about how I got lucky just this once, but my sure-proof go-to steps for manifesting all my desires great and small in the physical using the Law of Attraction in a way that most people don’t know how to use it.
Ever since I spread my wings and left my parent’s home I have had amazing house karma. I have lived in the most beautiful houses over the years, not all big or luxurious but just perfect for that moment in every way. I have never had to live in dumps or bad neighborhoods and I have always been blessed with the best of neighbors. I have also always moved a lot, especially as a child in the United States. After I moved out on my own I lived in five different houses in Groningen in the Netherlands from 1987 to 1999. Then I lived in three different houses in Germany from 1999 to 2006 when I moved back to the Netherlands I moved four times from 2006 to 2018, but that was mostly in the beginning until I had my own house where we lived from 2009 to 2018 before we started traveling and moved to Ibiza in 2020.
Some of my favorite homes include the homes where my sons were born in the Netherlands and in Germany which were both amazing, my mom’s doll house in the Jordaan in Amsterdam which was so adorable but incredibly small, and my current home which has breathtaking views of the Ibicencan mountains which never gets old to look at.
I have always lived in amazing houses, but that doesn’t mean it was always easy to get them. When I needed a house in Germany in 1999, I had to move but I didn’t have the money and my relatives who had money refused to help me financially, but as soon as I set the move in motion the Universe stepped in and all the money I needed to move showed up in a miraculous way. When I got my own home in Amsterdam in 2009 I was on welfare and I didn’t have the money to move or furnish my new home. The welfare department rejected my loan application, I applied to appeal their decision and this pompous government lawyer rejected my appeal.
When I came in he said ‘Oh you are an author…’ and then proceeded to ask me if I was the author who had the exact same name as I was born with and wrote a book on the law as she was a lawyer. I answered no and he smugly said ‘Of course, you’re not otherwise you wouldn’t be here needing a loan would you?’ He of course denied me the loan again.
Trust me when I say that I know what it’s like to move through obstacles in order to bring about a manifestation because sometimes manifestations become more difficult as they progress. This doesn’t mean they aren’t meant to be as many people would interpret it, rather they are a sign not to give up.
“Every great work, every big accomplishment has been brought into manifestation through holding to the vision. And often just before the big achievement comes apparent failure and discouragement.”
Florence Scovel Shinn
I had already manifested a complete house with a garden for my kids to play in despite only receiving urgency/priority for an upper-floor apartment. I was also already paying the rent, all I needed was the money to enter the house because it was completely renovated and had nothing on the walls or floors. I refused to take ‘No’ for an answer because the answer made no sense. Their reasoning was that I didn’t need the loan because I could continue to live with my mother together with my children even though I already had my own home to live in. I am very grateful to my mother that she helped us through that difficult time, but a five and a nine-year-old need room to play and be themselves not live with their grandmother in an upper-floor apartment.
I went to another department that was helping me get off of welfare as I was intensely motivated to accomplish at that time, they made one phone call and everything fell into place. I got my loan almost immediately with a budget of around three and a half thousand euros to have the house wallpapered, floors laid, and everything painted as well as use what was left of the money to buy second-hand furniture. I got the house ready and furnished and moved in with my kids. It was only one and a half years later that I got myself and the kids off of welfare through the internet (check my press kit for the news stories from that time).
As soon as I got myself organized in my new home, I started looking for ways to make money on the internet and thirteen months later I was financially self-sufficient through the online job I had created for myself. This was the larger goal I had been working to manifest, and having my own home was an important piece of the puzzle in accomplishing my dream of being able to work from home so that I could organize my work around the life and school times of my young kids back then.
Most of my housing manifestations in the past, except for the last two were unconscious so when I was put in front of a fait accompli by my current landlord, with little time to find a new place in a very tight housing market that made prices skyrocket (even more) in the past two and a half years I tapped into all my experiences of the past to now deliberately manifest the home of my dreams. It went super quick after that because as soon as I got clear on what I was looking for I found the home of my dreams the same day (two weeks into when I started searching), the deal was sealed another two weeks later and we can move in on the first of December or maybe even one to two weeks sooner.
One of the worst housing markets worldwide
Ibiza is known to be one of the worst housing markets worldwide and it is the second most expensive housing market in Spain. This is because not only do the Spanish and Spanish-speaking people flock to this island so do the Dutch, the English, the French, the Germans, Romanians, and basically everyone else that lives here including Americans, Canadians, Indians, Marrocans, Africans, etc.
It’s not that there aren’t enough empty houses because especially in the winter probably around 60-75% of the houses are empty as most owners live off the island. Parts of the island become absolute ghost towns in the winter with tourists gone and some of the shops, restaurants, hotels, and clubs closing during the winter period to go on vacation and recover from the summer madness. Some of the owners do also rent their house or apartment during the winter months for surprisingly good prices, but this is only because you have to be out by April, May, or June because these houses go on the market then for absolutely obscene prices. Prices that they’re not actually worth, but that tourists are willing to pay to be able to spend time on this absolutely magical island that is bathed in sunshine during the summer months.
Just to give you an idea, the street I live on now has four buildings with each having two staircases and six big luxury apartments in each staircase. That’s forty-eight apartments in total and of those forty-eight apartments there are maybe ten being lived in permanently, the rest are being used as vacation homes. That means that this street which is a high-end area and not representative of where most people in Ibiza live, is only occupied by ± 21% all year round, the other 79% of the apartments are only being used some of the time and usually, this is only somewhere between three to four months in total a year.
The new urbanization I am moving into is no different, there’s a yoga study there, two Spanish couples that live there all year round, and us. This means that there are way more people searching for a house or apartment in Ibiza than there are available rental objects for and what happens when the demand exceeds the supply? Prices skyrocket. For the people that live and work here, this also means that many of them can’t afford to live independently and that many people are forced to share their homes to be able to pay the rent as rents here tend to be higher than the Spanish wages.
In fact, if the government doesn’t curb the immense greed of some of the homeowners (not all of course), Ibiza is heading towards a situation where Ibiza is the island of the rich with no staff to serve them as people earning normal wages can’t afford to live here. That’s how dire the housing situation is getting here. The upside of this is that there’s loads of work here and not enough staff to hire, you can basically pick and choose where you want to work and the pay is generally good but the hours are long. Work shifts of 10-12 hours are normal in the summer when the island population of 160.000 people grows to in the millions with all the tourists coming to visit.
However what good is a job without a home that you can afford?
You can imagine that securing a home here is not easy as there are a lot of people looking at the same houses. The other thing is that many of the houses are absolutely not worth the asking price, but negotiations are difficult because of the high level of interest. In the past, I have even missed out on a house because someone else outbid me. On the other hand, houses that are extremely overpriced and not worth it do tend to be on the market for a long time which means that the market does self-regulate to a degree.
There is another issue that creates a higher demand than supply because many of the owners of rental objects often don’t care if their place is rented or not. They would rather not rent at all than not get the price they want, because there is always the summer to rent out to tourists even illegally (without a tourist license), and risking huge fines because they can make in three to six months up to two or three times what they could get renting it out annually. A friend of mine rented out her three-bedroom apartment in the summer for €28K to a couple of musicians that stayed there four months. If you do the math that is €7K a month. This same apartment is rented out in the winter for €1800 a month, that’s how huge the difference can be between winter and summer rental fees.
My friend actually lives in this house and only rents it out when she has work that is off the island. Although this isn’t always guaranteed, this winter she couldn’t find anyone interested because the people who want to be here in the winter generally want to be here all year round and there aren’t that many people looking to rent during the winter months when there’s hardly anyone on the island, the clubs are closed and the weather is colder which is why the prices drop drastically over the winter because there’s less demand and a surplus in supply. I personally live here for the winters and am not a big fan of the summers, especially the month of August can get crazy hot, and the humidity – ugh. Many people that live here on the island actually leave in August if they can just to escape the summer heat.
Because of all of the above, the chances are high that your landlord doesn’t give a crap about you because he or she has only gone into real estate to earn money. When there is more demand than supply, landlords are in a position where they can pick and choose their tenants to have them accept terms that are completely unreasonable. This was certainly true for my current landlord, the worst landlord I have ever had who was all about investing as little as possible and maximizing profits to the point of ridiculousness. When real estate is booming it tends to attract cut-throat types like this who are looking to ruthlessly increase their investments at all costs.
Are all the landlords here like this? Certainly not, a client of mine is coming to live here for three months, and through another friend, she got a sweet little studio for €500 a month. Most studios here start at €750 these days, but this owner rents a lot to locals and people seeking to move here permanently and she has kept her prices affordable for those that don’t have the money to pay the exorbitant rents that have become almost a signature of this island.
Very karmic relationship with the landlord
However living in Ibiza is not as easy as you may think because the energetic frequency of the island is so high, it brings up all your deeply buried sh*t. A friend of mine once said that living in Ibiza is like being on ayahuasca 24/7. I have personally never tried ayahuasca, it doesn’t vibe with me but I know everyone that lives here has a story of how Ibiza changed their life and even had them become more spiritual when they had no spiritual interest prior to coming here. The energy of this island just opens you up and not everyone can handle that.
They say if Ibiza doesn’t want you here, you will be run off the island. But, if you’re meant to be here Ibiza will always provide you with a home. In the past two and a half years I have often wondered if I was being run off the island, to be honest.
I ended up moving into the house of a landlord that I had SEVEN very painful previous lives with! Just to make sure that you understand what this means, I don’t go sit down and remember my past lives while meditating which I absolutely believe some people are capable of but most people who think they are, are not. I find my past lives with other healers and these seven past lives I found with various different healers, using different healing modalities and not just one healer ‘reading’ my past lives to me which is also not my preferred method for past life work as it tends to be very inaccurate.
It’s also definitely not normal to have so many past lives with the same person that then need to come up for healing, but in this case six of the past lives were about me being victimized by him while the seventh past life was about the immense pain I had felt having to leave her (him) behind to protect her and myself in a lifetime at the beginning of humanity. In that life, I was the male who loved her dearly to the extent that I didn’t want to leave her behind – but couldn’t stay either. I left, but in my heart, I refused to let her go. This created a trauma bond with her, bringing us back into each other’s lives in painful ways over and over again.
It took me two years of intense journeying with multiple healers, to bring up all of these places where I was subconsciously resenting this man for what ‘he’ (his past life predecessors) had done to ‘me’ (my past life predecessors) that I had inherited and was still harboring against him. (Read this soul teaching on reincarnation to understand that we are not our past life selves). All of this resentment was actually a secondary emotion covering the real primal unresolved pain I had connected to him, which was having to let him go when he was a woman and I was a man. We found this past life two days after he out of the blue insisted I vacate the premises asap. It triggered the memory of my past life where I was forced to leave him when he was a woman when I wanted to be with her and stay, but couldn’t.
This only goes to show you that healing something doesn’t always mean, that the situation is going to stay. It may simply dissolve in another way. Many people who chase love and light teachings believe that things need to be repaired to be healed, but that isn’t necessarily true, especially because in this case the healing was done on my side and not also on his. That people change is a possibility, but it’s not the ONLY possibility, the situation can cease to exist or dissolve in many different ways. His kicking us out is just one way for the situation to dissolve now that the healing has taken place and it has allowed me to leave without feeling resentful toward him.
This time I leave ties severed, not in anger but able to understand why we had to live through all we lived through in these different incarnations and be at peace with it. Everything I was subconsciously harboring against this person was made conscious or is in the process of being made conscious which has allowed us to make a clean slate so that I am no longer bound to him by my own subconscious unresolved pain caused by the inherited trauma I had with him from my past life predecessors.
Picturing Divine order
I have loved living here and I am very grateful to this home for supporting me through this process, but I am also very excited to move into our new home and the life that we are going to live there. One of the things I started early in this year, long before he asked us to leave is start with a Florence Scovel Shinn, inspired affirmation:
“God is my landlord, I rent from the Divine.”
Just as clients or jobs are not our supply when it comes to money, our housing is a gift from God, the Universe, or whatever you call this higher power in your life – as well. Everything we have, everything we ‘own’ is given to us as a gift from Source, the houses (or roofs over our heads) that we live in are no exception. I put this affirmation on post-its around my home and on digital post-its on my phone, to really impress on the subconscious mind that this was my new reality. I chose to see God as my landlord and to realize that I was renting from the Divine. If you still have a lot of unresolved religious trauma, the word ‘God’ might not work for you. You can also say Source is my landlord, or the Universe is my landlord – the point is to realize that your housing is in Divine hands and not in earthly hands.
In our case, that was particularly important because this landlord was a bit of a bully, used to getting away with things because he has an endless supply of people wanting to rent his apartments. I paid €8100 deposit to get in this house to find the jacuzzi broken, the door and window locks mostly not working, the refrigerator freezing everything including the vegetable drawer, dirty broken old shower heads, and an oven grill that fell on my hand the first time we used the oven. You can imagine how cheated I felt, paying so much for something with so many hidden issues not to mention how used up all the furniture turned out to be. Later I heard from my neighbor who also rented from the same landlord that they faced the same issues and when they left and new tenants entered, they faced the same issues too despite paying the rent six months in advance (I forgot to mention this above, but many landlords ask up to a year’s rent upfront).
My new neighbors paid around €24K to enter the home and their jacuzzi didn’t work, their fridge leaks water everywhere, they faced the same issue with the bathrooms, etc. They know I am leaving and they are super eager, to get their friends into my apartment despite their own still brief negative experiences with this landlord. They don’t care and their friends don’t care, because even though these houses aren’t worth what they are paying – they still want to live here. They know they are being overcharged and being cheated out of their money, but they are willing to pay that price.
The landlord knows this and so even though he sometimes gets dumped by realtors not willing to play his game, there are always more realtors he can turn to for free (the tenants pay the realtor fee) to bring in new people happy to endure his abuse. Considering it a small price to pay, to be able to live in these beautiful apartments that he forces them to pay all repairs for as if they were the owner instead of him. Also keeping the deposits to paint the house or replace old and broken appliances that are part of the rental payment. He has already successfully kept at least three of the past tenant’s deposits, and because they are foreigners in a foreign country (Spanish people will never rent at these prices) they often leave it like that simply to avoid the hassle or further incurring costs in case they don’t win.
So rather than see myself at this landlord’s mercy, I declared that God is my landlord to bring the situation back into Divine order.
Healing doesn’t mean others will change too
This is also why I couldn’t stay in this apartment because that energy was no longer a vibrational match to me. This is a dangerous thing to say because it can easily be misunderstood. In my current life, I have never been a vibrational match to this kind of energy at least not consciously.
I enjoy having money, but I am not a slave to money – nor do I allow others to enslave me because of money. However, I carried a lot of unresolved trauma around being enslaved by money as well as a karmic debt around money where I wasn’t any different or perhaps even worse than my current landlord that I was able to heal in this apartment because of his behavior triggering these unresolved places in my subconscious. The way I felt in relation to the landlord and my housing situation was often exactly how I had felt in the various previous lifetimes that he unbeknownst to himself was helping me heal.
Once the healing was done, the reason for me to live in his apartment was done as well. He is not going to change, he continues in the exact same way he always has with the new tenants next door, and in the same way that he will continue in the future with the new tenants here in this apartment after I leave. Even though this sets him up for a terrible relationship with all of his tenants, he doesn’t care they are easily replaced as far as he is concerned. His motto is literally my way or the highway. He could easily remedy these bad relationships with his tenants on his end by being a better landlord and making sure that the apartments justify the high rents or deposits. If everything in the house is dated and broken, there’s no reason to ask for a large deposit – unless, of course, you intend to keep that deposit to fix things in the house that are not the tenant’s responsibility. Alas, the man is who he is and he will probably stay like this for the number of decades he still has to live. He is in his sixties or seventies I believe.
This is the reality of things, sometimes no matter how much we heal or change – the other person stays where they are for whatever reason and there’s no other option but to accept this. This is true in cases like this, but it’s especially true in more intimate love relationships where this works in the very same way. People change when they want or need to change and the idea that we can change others by healing ourselves is incorrect, even in for example the situation of Twin Flames where the healing can work through to the other to some degree. We cannot heal to the extent that it forces or elicits someone to come back to us or to continue a relationship with us. The reason people often find it hard to accept this is because of what they believe it says about who they are or what they are worth if this person leaves their life.
It’s then not the person that they cling to, but to how they see themselves subconsciously which is the pain that gets triggered by the other leaving.
You may want to read that again if you are struggling to let someone go, it’s not them leaving that is causing the pain – it’s the unresolved pain in you that gets triggered by their leaving that makes you want them to come back so you don’t have to feel that pain. This is true whether this person is good for you or not, which makes it even more absurd to cling to them if you think about it. Of course, if we were conscious of these dynamics we would be able to see the true underlying cause of our suffering and remedy it, but because this is all deeply buried in our subconscious we often only get the truth exposed by deliberately going into the subconscious to find what is there lurking in our shadows.
We all feel extremely comfortable with the light inside and outside of us, but it’s through working through our shadow aspects that we bring the light into them. This is necessary because as long as they are stuck in the shadows, we are doomed to live them out in our external reality because that is how we make our subconscious beliefs and unresolved pain visible to ourselves – by pulling in the people, situations, and experiences that help us remember the things we don’t want to look at from this lifetime as well as from previous lifetimes.
It was because of my unresolved pain around greed and money through past life trauma and karma, that I became a vibrational match for this person and the experiences I lived with him. It’s through healing that unresolved pain, that I am no longer a vibrational match to this situation and that it is now dissolving as it has served its purpose.
What I did to manifest a new home
In a way, my manifestation was months in the making because I had already started with little things such as the ‘God is my landlord’ affirmation. Putting ‘a loving home owned by a loving landlord’ on my wishlist from the Universe and just the practical steps of setting up internet alerts on housing sites, letting my friends know that I was in the market for a new home, and contacting realtors. But because the temperatures stay high here till mid-October, the summer season lasts that long too meaning that you won’t find any ‘affordable’ housing till October or November. I had alerts coming in daily over the summer as we had already decided to leave before he insisted on it but the prices were insane.
Here’s what I did despite a very tight market and huge competition for each available home to secure the home of my dreams according to my wishes in a matter of weeks. It took me two weeks to find the apartment and another two weeks to seal the deal in the most perfect way. I remember the surprised look on the realtor’s face when I told her during our first tour of the house that I would take it. In fact, the realtors were the major cause of ‘delay’ in checking my finances and drawing up the contract (basically, the time they needed to do their job correctly) because the landlord and I were smitten with each other from day one.
Our new landlords are a young English couple with two kids that outgrew their home and now decided to rent it. The woman who is the actual owner and I hit it off from the get-go and she is delighted that we are the people going to be renting her home. I have always had an amazing relationship with my landlords in the past, which were often young families generating income from a family home or even an investment project. This is also something that is very important to me to have a good relationship with the people who own the house or apartment I live in.
Let me take you through how I got here:
I got crystal clear on what I wanted
One thing I realized when I asked myself what I really wanted from a new home was that the current apartment I live in has a very cold and soulless energy, despite all the love we have put into it. It’s just your typical hot summer luxury vacation-style home and to be honest my bedroom with bathroom ensuite is much like any other 5-star hotel room again despite me really making it my own. I had a realtor who is familiar with these apartments see my bedroom as part of an overall house tour and she said that it was the most beautifully styled bedroom she had seen in all of these apartments. I did my best to bring in the love and the soul, but that cold and soulless energy was so prevalent that you could hardly mask it and it wasn’t until we were leaving that we really noticed this. Nor had others noticed it when they visited us.
So that became my main focus for the new house; I wanted a home that has heart and soul. In fact, long before the necessity to move came up, I had written on my wishlist to the Universe to please bring me a beautiful home for my family to live in filled with love and with a loving landlord.
I was on a mission to find a home that has soul and is filled with love.
The first house I fell in love with had another greedy landlord. First, she raised the price with €200 a month despite there being a construction site next door where they would be building for a year. When I asked the realtor for a viewing to make a bid the owner decided she was only going to rent the three-bedroom house for the summer season. It was rented annually at the time, but if you remember you can actually earn as much in the summer or even more than you would be renting out the whole year. So, this landlord didn’t meet that second criterion. However, the second home I fell in love with met both criteria and that is the apartment we got.
I started packing long before I found a house
As soon as we got word we had to leave in the first week of October, we started packing even though we had not found a house yet. Of course, we had a couple of months to find a new place but because of everything that had already happened with this landlord I simply took it as my cue to leave now. With the work that I do, I need a firm and rooted foundation which is of course first and foremost inside of me, but I also need to give myself that externally and this apartment could not offer me this. There’s simply always an issue, if it’s not with the landlord, it’s with the electricity company, or the appliances breaking down and the owner refusing to have them repaired.
Last Christmas morning we woke up to the kitchen and living room floor wet because the rubber in the fourteen-year-old washing machine had torn due to old age. I had it fixed and deducted it from my rent, as the landlord refused to pay it. Three months later the boiler blew the fuse box and needed to be repaired, it was filled with calcium deposit which was creating excessive energy bills because the heating element had to heat through the calcium buildup. I got slapped with almost €5K in electricity bills spanning over a period of approximately six months, because of it and this was even before we were in an energy crisis. In fact, as soon as the boiler was fixed the bills went down drastically.
Again, he tried to stick me with the repair bill but the boiler is part of the apartment’s infrastructure that he needs to maintain and not his tenants. It was time to go and so we simply started packing the things we didn’t immediately need so that when we did find our new home we were ready to move.
Besides, there’s no better way to show the Universe and your subconscious mind that you are serious about finding a new home than putting all your belongings in boxes.
Florence Scovel Shinn grandmother of metaphysics always said to dig your ditches, meaning that we must prepare for the things we have asked for when there isn’t the slightest sign of it in sight. I wanted a new home to move into, therefore starting to pack even though I didn’t have a new place to move into yet was digging my ditches. I was preparing for what I wanted, my new home.
I set up internet alerts & started calling real estate agents
You can’t manifest what you want without practical action, yes it is possible that someone will somehow call you up out of nowhere and offer you your dream home but the odds aren’t very favorable, aka there’s a small chance that it will happen like this. It’s better to really take practical actions at times which is why I set up internet alerts on housing sites, told friends I was looking to move, and contacted real estate agents who are often the gatekeepers to the houses here on the island.
In the end, that is also how I found my dream home, through a housing site where real estate agents publish their portfolios as well. There are a lot of scammers active and you wouldn’t be the first scammed out of a substantial amount of money (rent and multiple months deposit) by some cowboy that rented you an apartment that doesn’t belong to him – which leaves you houseless and penniless. Agents are often worth the extra fee, simply to make sure that you are actually going to be able to move into the home you paid for. That being said, they can be an absolute waste of money as well. I would say that the realtor I had to pay for my first apartment was an absolute waste of money. The current realtors got me €200 off the rental price by getting the community fees inside the monthly rent instead of excluded.
I think this is where a lot of people go wrong in manifesting something is that they are so focused on the energetics of things, that they forget to take common-sense action. If you are looking for a new home, you have to look in the places where you will actually find them and not insist that a house will come floating in on a cloud while you sit on your pillow to meditate.
I chose to leave my current home in top condition
Everything in this apartment was old and broken something that wasn’t so visible on the photos or on the first viewing, so when I moved in I decided I wasn’t going to live in such a state and be irritated by it daily. I decided to replace close to everything that was broken and threw out a lot of the owner’s stuff. Old ripped rugs, dressers, mattresses, pillows, etc. Some of it I stored in the garage, but most of it I threw out. Now that I am leaving, I have to replace the things I threw out.
I bought new pillows, I arranged second-hand matrasses from a hotel, I will simply leave the dressers I bought and I bought a new rug to replace the rug I had thrown out. Why would I do that? Because spiritual law doesn’t allow for pettiness. I made the decision to throw out his stuff and replace things that I was not willing to accept. It was my decision and part of living radical responsibility is taking responsibility for your own choices. I could have made do with the crappy furniture in the house but chose not to.
Yes, the landlord is a d*ck for charging high rents and offering low value but he’s creating his own karma, and that is his responsibility, in the same way, that it’s my responsibility to avoid creating new karma here over a couple of hundred or thousand dollars. I thoroughly enjoyed using the replacements I bought in the two and a half years that I lived here and I hope the future tenants will enjoy them as well.
Perhaps it can start a trend of paying it forward to the next tenant, each tenant upgrading the apartment for the next tenant to come. Why not? Let’s spread the love.
The very first thing my new landlady told me was that she was going to buy a new showerhead and refresh the painting on the walls for us. You receive what you put out there and without asking she was thinking of small yet important details that tenants really appreciate. Replacing a showerhead costs nothing it’s less than a €25 investment, yet the impact of such a gesture is much deeper especially if you have just moved from an apartment where you had to replace double showerheads in three bathrooms because nobody thought of replacing them – not even the realtor who can charge the costs to the landlord.
I paid €14K just to get into the old apartment, which was the first month’s rent, the deposit, and the realtor fee, and they couldn’t even change the showerheads which were both dirty and broken. My new neighbors who paid, even more, to get into their apartment also did not get new and fresh showerheads and you would think that after paying six months upfront they would get some form of appreciation. They didn’t, they got the exact same treatment that all his tenants get. Often we take things very personally when it’s not personal at all. Having neighbors who rent from the same landlord made me realize that his behavior is simply what it is, it is all he is capable of.
I can take it personally and stoop to his level or take the high road instead. One of the biggest benefits of healing is that you’re no longer subconsciously driven by your emotions, blindly reacting from your own pain. A healed person gets to choose how they want to respond because they can act from their heart and not from their unhealed trauma-filter.
Be willing to make compromises
The day I found my dream home was the day that I called a coach/friend here on the island telling him that I didn’t know how to move forward and that nothing was working. I was stuck in split energy, was I supposed to stay or meant to leave the island? If I was meant to leave I had no idea where to. The other question I wasn’t sure on was if I was going to be forced to take a temporary solution or would I be able to secure a more permanent one? Two thirds of the rentals being posted online were ONLY for the winter season, which meant you had to be out before the summer.
I had just found a place that was more than big enough for the three of us and it had already been yanked off the market by the owner who wanted to cash in on the summer prices. I am normally not a person that doesn’t know how to move forward, but now I truly didn’t know what my next step was going to be. I needed some fresh eyes to help me see things from a different perspective.
I had called him to book a session, but instead, he gifted me a coaching call by phone and we talked about making compromises. What was I really looking for and what was I willing to give up? I was looking for a three-bedroom apartment with a fireplace, air conditioning for the summer heat and a pool to exercise and cool off in. A bathtub was a nice-to-have but not a deal breaker for me because I shower more than I enjoy bathing. If I really want to take a bath, I can always book a hotel to enjoy one so it wasn’t that big a priority on my list.
A fireplace however was at the top of the list not only to save on heating costs (electricity) but also because the heating here is often hot air being blown into the room, which is the worst kind of heating. As soon as you turn the hot air which comes from the air conditioning off, the room is cold again within minutes. To many of us ex-pats, this is the worst kind of heat. We come from countries with good heating systems so we actually prefer using the fireplace instead of this hot air because although the summers here are nice and hot – the winters can be cold. Not the rest of Europe cold, but cold enough to be uncomfortable without a heating system and yep you guessed it that is also possible here. You can rent houses without air conditioning or heating, heck the previous tenants in my apartment were even renting out the garage storage room for people to sleep in.
However, at the top of my list was the desire that the new apartment or house would have heart and soul above anything else. I gave one other house with four bedrooms a shot that already had not appealed to me in the pictures, but the house was terrible and the energy of the owner was very unpleasant. This experience told me to trust my gut and the next and only other apartment I went to view was my dream home, which I made sure to directly make a bid on as I was one of the many people viewing it that day.
Recently, my son had broken up with his girlfriend who he had been with for fifteen months because he wanted to return to the Netherlands. The very next day he decided he wanted to stay on the island another year. This meant that he could basically leave any day because teenagers simply do change their minds often. A week later he was thinking of taking a job with a Dutch company in Malta but then changed his mind again. Although I had not expected him to move out any time soon, I suddenly realized that also my youngest was getting ready to leave the nest and it wouldn’t be long before he did spread his wings as he should.
When I thought about it, I realized that it was insane to look for a three-bedroom apartment if he could be gone within a year. Having traveled as a family for two years, we have had to camp out in smaller living spaces before which made much more sense than paying extra for a home that had a third bedroom and then having to move again after he leaves because we don’t need so much space anymore. Plus, rental prices had gone up more than 10% post-pandemic with the risk of having to pay even more for a new place if we had to move again in one or two years. It was a much safer bet to get the home the rest of us wanted to live in and find a solution for my son for the period in between.
That’s when I found a very spacious two-bedroom apartment with a fireplace, bathtub, and community pool. It came with air conditioning in the summer and floor heating for the winter that was filled with love and had absolute heart and soul. Not only that it’s where we go to our acupuncturist and there’s a yoga studio around the corner in the same gated community we will move into. It’s close to town with a bus going up and down, which relieves me of my designated driver duties as soon as anyone needs to go anywhere because I am the only one with a driver’s license, when before we lived in the middle of nowhere and the only other option to get anywhere is to call a cab or hitchhike. We will still live in a quiet place, but with good connections to various facilities so that all my family members can move around independently instead of depending on me or running up large taxi bills which they had to take when I couldn’t drive them.
In short, except for the one extra bedroom – this was EVERYTHING that we wanted and more. Especially because home is where I spend most of my time because I work from home as well. I don’t need or have an extra office to work in. My son, on the other hand, spends ten to twelve hours a day on the beach at his work. He’s hardly home, he only comes home to eat, shower, and sleep or to get ready to go out with friends. This just made so much more sense, than moving now and having to move again later.
The other two houses we had looked at before had the extra bedroom but one didn’t have air conditioning except in one room and both of them didn’t have a pool nor did they have good connections to town which would have meant having to drive everyone around again. Not to mention unsympathetic owners which made them an immediate no-go. None of the houses and apartments I looked at had everything we were looking for, they all demanded a compromise one way or the other. The home we chose was the closest to our wish list for desired amenities and a 100% fit in regards to the energy frequency we were looking to live in.
Act as if the new home is already mine
The next thing I did was act as if the new home was already mine, not just in energy or in my mind but by taking actions as if the deal was already done. More digging my ditches, the first thing I did was buy these cute ‘Heaven on Earth’ cushions for our terrace couch. These were relatively inexpensive, and even though there was a small voice in my head that said but what if you don’t get the apartment? I pushed past it and bought a beautiful and more expensive Pip Studio carpet, for the dining area that I would likely not be able to use somewhere else if the apartment fell through. It meant that I was going all in with my energy on this space because I was putting my money where my mouth was so to speak. I was preparing for what I wanted, by doing the things I would do if the apartment was already mine. The house has a tiled floor, so a rug under the dining room table will not only look amazing but will be very comfortable.
This is what is called manifestation anchors, where you buy something or you could also make it that allows you to anchor in the new energy frequency. I have written a separate teaching on how to use manifestation anchors, which you can read here.
One word of warning, this can only be used if that which you desire is free or available. Florence Scovel Shinn tells the story of a woman who used her manifestation power to get a house that belonged to someone else and the owner died to bring it about. If you violate spiritual law to get your egoic desires met, then you will pay the karmic price. There’s a Divine selection in everything for everyone and so there’s no need to take from others, whatever it is that they have there’s a Divine selection for you that is your perfect fit – in a way that having what they have can never fulfill you. Put your energy into what is meant for you.
I got movers and other professionals on standby
As soon as I found my new dream home and knew just about what timeframe I would be moving in more or less, I got a team of movers on standby and I called the guys who installed my reverse osmosis water filter to be on standby to move the filter installation from the old to the new apartment.
More digging my ditches, I called these guys end-October to let them know that between mid-November to December I would be moving and needed their help. The team that is going to move me, is also coming to put in a new door that I had to replace because my son accidentally ruined his door by not securing the water deposit on the dehumidifier next to his room. During the night the water spilled on the floor and the door could hardly be opened the next day because the water had made the MDF in the door expand to the point that it was irreparable. We had to have a door custom-made (€300+) and installed, which is scheduled for the upcoming week. As a tenant, this is of course our responsibility to fix as it was our negligence that caused it.
Because we are already mostly packed, I am having the cleaner deep clean the things we no longer use in the weeks leading up to our move so that we don’t have to do all the deep cleaning when we leave. During the summer I had a personal organizer reorganize the kitchen and living room, which is also making our move super easy. Not to mention the decluttering we did at the beginning of the year.
I kept moving forward despite not having all of the money
Moving is never cheap, but if you rent from private owners it’s even more expensive. Just the rent, the deposit, and the realtor fee are around €10K for the new apartment. I am still paying down this absurd €5K electricity bill that as far as the landlord is not up for debate even though it’s his negligence that caused it, not to mention that I am still recovering from the retreat earlier this year that was in every other aspect extraordinary but financially somewhat of a challenge due to various different factors such as for example the pandemic.
Long story short, I did not have €10K extra lying around even though I of course had enough money to live off and pay my normal bills.
But I know how to tap into my cosmic bank account and by the time I needed to pay everything I had the €10K and more because I simultaneously had to pay a bigger tax bill that I also had the money for. I did have to borrow some money, but the Universe also provided me with an extra opportunity that would give me more money at my disposal now that I could pay back later next year if I needed to use it.
Money flows where the decision goes, if you make up your mind then often the money you need will simply show up. Funny thing is, the new landlord (the husband) confided in us that he had had to lend money from relatives as well in order to pay the six months in advance that their new landlord was demanding in cash and not by bank transfer. I had most of the money I needed through my business income and I simply borrowed the rest in case I needed it.
If I would have said to myself that I couldn’t afford to move, which was certainly the case when the landlord insisted we would leave – this money that came wouldn’t have come. Every time we tell ourselves we can’t afford something, we close the door to its manifestation. Not everything comes about through money of course, but a lot of things do and therefore you should NEVER tell yourself that you can’t afford what you want to have because the second you do – you tell yourself that you can’t have what you want because you don’t have the money. This blocks it from ever being able to manifest. You don’t have the cash now maybe, but that can change in a blink of an eye when you are working with spiritual law.
This is where a lot of people go wrong in their manifestation process because they try to insist that their desire is gifted to them without having to pay for it. This is already trying to mess with the ‘How’ of your manifestation, because why couldn’t you be able to get the money to buy it? People with a poverty mindset are always looking to win or be gifted what they want, but there are thousands of ways money can come to you. Here are just a couple of examples; you can find money in the street, you can get an unexpected tax refund, a bonus from your job, someone who owes you money finally pays, you can be offered a second or third side job, get a raise, get a back payment from your job, land a new high ticket client and the list goes on.
None of these examples are far-fetched, I remember that even at my poorest hour when we didn’t know how to buy the next groceries we found forty to fifty euros in small change in the park, and even one time my daughter then six walked past an abandoned ATM and it spits out a couple of twenty euro bills right in her hands. It was exactly the amount we needed to make it till the next payday. Now I am the one giving money to others, paying for their groceries, or like yesterday buying a homeless person on the street lunch at KFC because he was hungry but some of the most valuable lessons I learned about money was when I practically had none.
When you want to manifest something don’t limit the Universe in the ‘How’ it’s going to be delivered, not in how it’s going to come into your life or even in how you believe will be the ONLY way that money can show up in your life. The ‘how’ is none of our business and I am sure you have heard this a thousand times, but have you actually practiced it? Have you practiced simply trusting that the Universe and your soul will provide for you not only in your daily needs but also in your bigger dreams?
I made wishlists of everything I needed and wanted for my new home
I made IKEA and Amazon wishlists for the things I wanted for the new house such as fairy lights on the terrace, curtains in the bedrooms, and living room. Dining room chairs, a new set of dishes, table lamps, garden furniture, and more. I put it all on a wishlist while in my mind (this is called visualizing) I was styling my new home with the things I already have and the things I still needed to complete the look and have the functionalities I needed such as being able to sit at the table to eat. We brought over our dining room table from Amsterdam, simply because we loved it so much but we sold the chairs because our current home has a big dining room table with chairs.
We have our own beds with matrasses, living room, and bedroom carpets (also from Pip Studio), coffee tables, towels, pots & pans, kitchen utensils, etc, But we also still need some things that we didn’t have anymore. As I was making these lists I thought to myself wouldn’t it be great to invite my clients and followers to pick something from the list great or small to send me as a gift? I can’t imagine anything more fun and satisfying than living in a house filled with love, full of things that were gifted to me out of love. Sure, I could buy everything myself but I thought this could be such a wonderful exercise in opening up to receive more love. I have always been a fantastic giver, I am an ace at giving gifts, value, and being generous but part of my personal challenge in this lifetime is to open to receive more love. For those of you who followed my healing journey, you know that growing up I decided that it wasn’t safe to be loved and that I didn’t deserve love.
I am sure that there will be people who think the idea is stupid or whatever, but the idea makes my heart sing. I would love to sit at my table remembering in gratitude that this chair I am sitting on was gifted to me out of love. Or switch on a light and think oh yes this beautiful lamp was a present from so-and-so. It just lights me up to think of this. Am I always going to furnish my homes like this? Probably not, but at this moment where I am now in my own journey I love this idea and I would love to gift this to my inner child who made those decisions about love way back when I was just a little girl. I can just imagine her excitement every time the doorbell rings and a new present arrives for her at the door. That’s simply not an experience you can give yourself, so I love the idea of engaging my clients and followers in this. If this starts a trend, good! Count me in, I’ll send you a present when you do this as a way to open up to receive more love.
Would you like to send me a housewarming gift? Here’s the link to my Amazon wishlist.
I used affirmations to push past fear as well as negative thinking
Last but not least fear, of course, reared its ugly head, fear of loss that is. It doesn’t matter how ‘enlightened’ you become the mind continues to do its thing. I think the big difference is that you learn not to take the mind and what it says so seriously. When I didn’t hear from the realtors for more than three days I started worrying and that worry became ‘paranoia’ as time elapsed because what if they decided we weren’t the right tenants and had rented it to someone else without letting us know? I had verbal confirmation from the owner and the realtor, but what if the realtor convinced the owner that someone else was better suited? Then I saw someone in a local Facebook group for Ibiza residents asking what she could do if the realtor had promised her the house but then rented it to someone else. Apparently, my dreamed-up scenario wasn’t that paranoid after all, because this person was living that exact experience.
Some people would ask themselves, is this a sign from the Universe? But signs are what you interpret them to be.
I have the book ‘The Wisdom of Florence Scovel Shinn’ next to my bed for moments like this, it’s a compilation of all of her books. I have had this book since 2005 and it is the most used book I own. I have read it from back to front multiple times and use it whenever I need to, to get courage, and inspiration, or to get planted back into spiritual law when my mind takes over. Many of the affirmations I know by heart by now, so one that I immediately started with was ‘There’s no loss in Divine mind, therefore I cannot lose what is mine by Divine right. It will be restored to me or I will receive its equivalent.’ I used this and other affirmations to quiet my mind over the weekend and then messaged the realtors Monday morning to ask where things stood. They answered that they were working on the draft rental contract and that I would receive it soon.
It was literally just all in my head, however, using my mind to ease my mind was how I got through this. I told myself that even if this did fall through it would be to protect me and something better would show up. I had not manifested all this money to not be able to get a new home. I told myself that I would be safe and that everything would work out even if I did not get this specific apartment. This is what a lot of people fail to do, surrender or move into a state of non-attachment to the outcome. I get it, it’s counterintuitive. Fear makes us wants to grasp tighter instead of letting go but clingy and desperate energy will mess up your manifestation process every time. You need to nip fear in the bud.
Of course, you are going to run into obstacles or fear somewhere along the line when you live boldly and dream BIG. It’s inevitable, the question is are you going to take a leap of faith or are you going to back down? The only way to get what you want is to take the leap of faith whether your obstacle is real or imaginary.
A home filled with love and loving owners
By the end of that same week, we had an appointment with our acupuncturist who is in the same gated community as our new home. I went in first and then ran some errands while my mother was getting her treatment, I had already hoped I would bump into my new landlords but that didn’t happen. When I came back the gate was closed and I had to ring the doorbell to get the acupuncturist to open the door for me, while we were out in the courtyard anyway I showed him our new place which was even closer to his office than I had first realized. He went with me and joked about swimming together in the pool in front of our apartment and coming by for coffee, lunches, or dinners. He could even do acupuncture house calls from now on, we didn’t need to come to him anymore. He would come to us.
As we moved back to the gate my new landlady walks in, she immediately recognizes us and leans in to hug and kiss me. In Spain it is quite common to greet with two kisses, even my kid’s friends will greet me with a kiss when they are in our home. But we ended up hugging and kissing something like four times in I’d say about fifteen minutes. While the realtors were making elephants out of molehills over small details the owner was talking about ‘our’ apartment as if we were already living there and pointing out all the fruit trees that we can pick fruit from as we please. They talked about how happy they are about renting it to us because the landlady went in to get her husband whom we hadn’t met yet.
I explained that initially, my son had decided to leave the island then changed his mind and that he would need to stay a bit with us, they said that this was absolutely no problem. In fact, they would ask the neighbor an English man who hasn’t been on the island in three years if my son could stay in his one-bedroom apartment for the time being. Apparently, his wife is sick and he’s a bit stuck with the apartment at the moment so this might actually help him out as well. My current landlord refused to even sign for my mother’s empadrionamiento (census certificate) because his lawyer advised him that she could otherwise squat the apartment, she’s eighty-three for crying out loud.
Can you imagine what a relief it is to have such darling landlords who are the polar opposite of our current landlord who seems to literally be heartless or at best seems to have a frozen heart? We are over the moon and as I said before, this is what my relationships with my landlords always have been like, warm, helpful, and pleasant. People always say that Germany is extremely racist, but when I told my new landlord in Germany that my then husband was black and asked him if that was an issue for him he responded with ‘Black is beautiful!’ and assured me that my husband’s skin color and that of my unborn child were no issue for him whatsoever. We rented from him for three years and he was a great landlord and friend.
So it’s wonderful to go back to that kind of relationship with a landlord because, to be honest, it’s exhausting if you constantly need to fight your landlord on everything. But it’s also something you sense in the house they own, in the end, our current apartment has this coldness that the owner also has in his energy. While the new apartment has the same warmth as its owners, it’s a real home instead of a vacation home. The shapes and forms are homely, the atmosphere is homely and filled with heart. The landlady bought the apartment nine years ago and had her children there with her loving husband. It is precisely what I asked for a loving home owned by loving landlords.
And although the price is still pretty up there, it’s around €750 a month cheaper than where I live now and where the landlord wanted to raise the rent which I refused to pay because I was already overpaying for it. Another Dutch family lives in the exact same apartment as I currently do, the apartments are completely identical and they are paying the same amount as my new rent (hundreds of euros less). In Dutch we have a name for this type of landlord, we call them “Huisjesmelkers” or house milkers, which refers to those who take advantage of a serious housing crisis to earn as much money as possible as quickly as possible.
Of course, all housing rentals are business agreements, meant to make the owner a profit but there’s making a profit, and then there’s cleaning someone out. I have paid my current landlord close to €100K in the past two years and a half years and he still wants more, not just a little bit more but much more while the furniture and household appliances he put in here are falling apart, another appliance just recently broke and the dryer has never worked, to begin with. In fact, every appliance in the home except for the air conditioning which is a built-in system has broken down during our two-and-a-half-year stay, that is how badly maintained this apartment is.
The difference between him and our new landlords is like day and night, for someone sensitive to energies the difference in energy is very palpable even though I have never met my current landlord face to face. He lives in Madrid and never comes out here. Yet his energy is all over this apartment, my mother hired someone to clear the house energetically when we moved in here and as the person she hired was clearing the space she felt the owner standing behind her energetically checking up on what she was doing. Long story short, if you rent privately and not from a corporation it’s so important to know who you will be renting from. For owners, it’s important to know who their tenants are, but for tenants having a good landlord is equally important. The biggest giveaway of what a person will be like in daily life is what energy they carry. This is why I insisted on meeting the new landlord I would be renting from, just so I could get a good feel of their energy.
How astrology factors in…
2020 was my best income year to date, but by the end of 2020, I had my lowest month in years. I didn’t realize it back then but Saturn had moved into my Sun sign Aquarius for a two-and-a-half-year stay called a Saturn transit. Saturn demanded I took a long hard look at my life foundations and rebuild them from the root.
Within that period I have completely reinvented my business, to create a much more solid foundation to expand on and serve more people than I would have been able to do under the ‘Twin Flame’ umbrella. Let’s just be real, to many people the Twin Flame is not a thing and they don’t take teachings on it seriously even though what I taught before remains true because spiritual law doesn’t change. It remains the same whether you are on the Twin Flame journey or not. But presenting my work as Twin Flame work is limiting the number of people that I can serve with my work because many people that would otherwise love to work with me are turned off by that label and I don’t blame them. The majority of the information on the Twin Flame journey is fantasy thinking that is absolutely not rooted in any sense of reality.
The work I do can help Twin Flames, but it can help anyone ready to look at the root causes of their issues or those seeking to heal the separation between the ego and the soul. Pulling myself out of the tight niche I had grown into was necessary because it was a dead-end street much like the dead-end street my old apartment is situated in. Perhaps I could have grown even bigger, but I could have never grown as big within the Twin Flame industry as I can grow outside of it. Yet, even more important because many Twin Flames didn’t want to hear what I had to say I was constantly kicked against, spit upon, and challenged by people who simply could not see the value of my work because all they ever wanted is to be with their person which they felt entitled to by Divine right because they had decided this was their Divine counterpart. I am sorry to break it to you honey, but it just don’t work like that.
For me, the past two years have been all about standing for the value of my work and bringing it in front of people that recognize its value and are eager to work with me. At some point, I realized that Twin Flames are so desperate to put an end to their pain that they would drink poison or eat grass if they thought it would bring back this person into their lives. Although my heart goes out to them and I understand their pain – I can’t help them if they aren’t willing to do what needs to be done to heal that pain. The answer simply doesn’t lie in this other person being together with them or not. It took mountains of energy to convince these people that the answer to their problems lies within them not outside of them and that was part of this whole Saturn transit in Aquarius theme.
According to Astrology, Saturn in Aquarius is a time of increased personal responsibilities, attention to detail, and efforts to maintain and improve health and personal affairs. You are challenged to become more efficient regarding energy levels and time management. It also talks about scaling up the professional ladder and getting the honor and respect you deserve. Source: Indastro.com
Within the Twin Flame industry, I was constantly fighting an uphill battle. I almost constantly had to convince people of the need to work on their own healing and at some point, it just left me exhausted and drained. So, I chose to open myself to people who already knew the power of healing and wanted to go deeper in their healing process than they had ever gone before and that is when I started getting psychologists, therapists, psychiatrists, healers, and hypnotherapists as clients which were not only so much easier to work with but also so much more satisfying because these people were ready to go deep into their own healing process. There was no struggle, no uphill battle, just pure flow which was like a balm to my soul.
In March 2023 Saturn leaves Aquarius to move into Pisces and so it’s interesting because this is one of the reasons I am bringing astrology up is that I signed the contract for my current apartment at the start of this Saturn two-and-a-half-year visit in Aquarius. I signed the contract in March 2020 but then didn’t get to move in because Spain went into lockdown and I couldn’t get back into the country till later that year. Now as the Saturn tour of Aquarius is ending, I am moving out. Saturn is considered the Lord of Karma for a good reason. It shows us the karmic imprint on our DNA and the experiences we are meant to have (good and bad). It represents the challenges we carry from past lifetimes, that we need to learn from and master in this lifetime according to Cosmiccuts.com.
It goes on to say that because we need to uncover, understand, and heal from karma, Saturn represents difficulties and hurdles, trials, and tribulations that we have to face in order to clear out the bad and create good karma. Living in this apartment during this Saturn transit in my sign is when I found my own karmic debt lifetime that I was still subconsciously and vibrationally carrying with me from a time when ‘my’ greed for money killed me and my sailing crew in a previous life where I was a slave runner. Now that this karma is settled, I am free to move on and no longer need to be in this energy in order to bring up my unresolved karma.
It will come as no surprise that I got my new rental contract in the eclipse window of the November 8th partial lunar eclipse that believe it or not is in my 4th sector of home. ‘The lunar eclipse arrives on November 8 and will bring a major turning point around home, family, or domestic matters. You could be quite emotional near this time. You may soon choose to move, relocate or even step in to help one of your kindred’ according to astrologer Kyle Thomas. I signed my new rental contract on November 8th, the day of the eclipse.
Eclipses are the Universe’s ‘wild cards’ that often force about the change that needs to happen in our lives. To be honest, if it had been up to us we would have stayed here in this old apartment for the duration of our five-year rental contract if there hadn’t been so much troublesome history. As I said, we didn’t even notice the coldness until we were forced to leave, but once you see the truth you can’t unsee it. Even if we could stay here now, I would choose not to because of what I have come to see over the past month that I was unable to see previously.
The eclipse energy which can deliver its message up to a month earlier or later (in my case a month prior) – was received loud and clear. A door had closed and a new door had opened, one that I was eager to step in through. Just to make sure that I didn’t end up signing a rotten deal like I did for my current apartment, I had my lawyers check my new contract. I had the old rental contract translated back then and checked but not by a lawyer, which makes it hard to contest the contract now which contains terms that my lawyers advised me later I should have never agreed to (another way the Universe made sure we’d leave when our time here was up).
Although I do not let astrology dictate my life obviously, sometimes its influence is strong enough to direct our lives nonetheless. It’s now that these influences are waning from my life that I can clearly see how much they have unbeknownst to me at the time affected me in ways I wouldn’t have believed possible. Luckily for me, Saturn takes 28/29 years to come full circle and thus spends on average close to 2-1/2 years in a sign. These hard aspects will therefore not be back for me until I am a senior citizen, thank God.
But it is worth a mention in regards to manifesting the life you dream of, that for the past year or so I have felt very frustrated about not having been able to see the results of all the freaking hard work that I have put in. To the point that I didn’t know what to do anymore, what was I doing wrong? Why was this working for others, but not for me? It’s been a while since I went through my Saturn return (at age 28/29), rereading about the influence of Saturn, helped me understand why I have not been seeing the fruits of my labor in the way I would have liked to in the past two years despite being a master manifestor and having such an amazing track record when it comes to manifesting.
‘There are no shortcuts with Saturn! Patience and effort are valued, but also efficiency. The rewards are usually delayed, and that’s the point. The results are long-lasting. With Saturn in Aquarius, we get the sense that we should work hard for our ideals if we want these conditions to last, grow, and strengthen.’ it says on Cafeastrology.com
Pisces, you guys are up next in 2023. My prayers are with you, but if you are an Aquarius like me this might make a lot of sense in regard to your lived experience from 2020-2022 and up till March 2023. If you are reading this teaching a few years from now, please check where Saturn is transiting at that time if you recognize elements of my story related to Saturn.
But if I had so much galactic support can I really claim that I manifested my dream home? Yes, I can. I could have given into fear and rented a shitty apartment that was cheap. I could have panicked and grabbed a temporary apartment and then have to face the consequences later on. I could have moved into the apartment above my son’s boss, but I was not willing to give up our privacy besides that arrangement would have only worked as long as my son worked for him. I could have taken my son up on his offer to take a more expensive home and him increasing our rental budget with €1000 a month, but I didn’t want to put him into a position where he couldn’t leave because we needed him to pay his part of the rent. I could have felt daunted by the reality of things and deemed my desires impossible but I did none of the above, focused on what I desired to create, and made it materialize with potentially being able to rent the apartment next door as well so that my son can take baby steps in living on his own before he moves out completely.
The planets and celestial activity were definitely very supportive, but I created the vision of what my dream home would look like and then went out and found the home that met almost all my desires and that had a creative solution for my son as well – for the price that I was willing to pay. I created a maximum budget of what I was willing to spend on a monthly basis and found everything I wanted within that price range. Instead of spending more money, I am saving a lot of money not only on rent, but also electricity, and in monthly cleaning costs. This allowed me to shave close to €1000 a month off my living costs, which adds up to €12K a year that we can use to travel more or spend on other things that are important to us. Status and prestige are not things that are important to me; beauty, comfort, and spending time with my loved ones are which is why I would rather spend my money on the latter.
Instead of letting the outer reality of scarcity in long-term rentals, the stiff price increase, the huge competition for each home as well as the even scarcer finds of the exact type of home I was looking for faze me or dictate what was and wasn’t possible, I turned to spiritual law and created my own reality. Rather than accepting what everyone else would see as an external reality of lack and scarcity that is immutable, I imprinted on that reality the reality I wanted to live through the correct use of spiritual law. That is what manifesting is, it is creating your own reality despite the perceived limitations of the external reality you are currently living in.
I pray this soul teaching serves you and helps you create the life you dream of, we are entering a new era where Heaven on Earth is the new paradigm. Living in 5D is the realm of instant manifestations, we are here to speed up timelines and I guarantee you NOTHING speeds up timelines more than releasing the unresolved pain that is keeping you locked into the old paradigm (of fear) and outdated realities. It is time to uplevel to the frequency of LOVE and the only way to do so is to release all the subconscious places within yourself where you are out of alignment to love without you even realizing it.